Common Mom

Yesterday evening, I was playing Princess Monopoly for the gazillionth time with my 4 year old daughter. Jason had just finished his bath and asked if he could play on the computer till we finished our game. We said sure, but he had to use the computer in his room (no Internet access). He was bummed, but didn’t complain. When he came out to the living room after about 15 minutes, he looked at me and Dan and said “Ya know, that was fun. But I sure wish I could have used the computer downstairs since mine doesn’t have Internet.”

And then it happened . . . I looked right at him without thinking and said “Buddy, you’re 6 - when I was 6, they didn’t even HAVE the Internet.” He looked at me in total disbelief and said “For serious? Whoooaaaaaa!”

I guess it’s just more proof that mom and dad come from “the olden days.”

We got our carpets cleaned yesterday - and in the process I noticed how heavy one of the rolly toy thingies was getting - a brief look in to one of the drawers and I realized it was full of junk toys - you know, Happy Meal toys, cheesy toys from the salon/restaurant, etc. Heck, my kids even get suckers from the liquor store (it’s right next to the salon - read on please). I realized it was our new junk drawer, and got to thinking - when did we become a society that believed we had to CONSTANTLY entertain our kids? Or bribe them to behave at dinner/school/church/the grocery store? We do a lot of stuff as a family - hiking, camping, the zoo, playing games, etc. . . . but at the same time, Dan and I are trying really hard to raise our kids so they don’t feel entitled to anything other than our unconditional love and to realize that they are in control of their choices and the consequenses. They have to earn things - good behavior and manners are expected, not rewarded. Bad behavior results in lost privileges.

Case in point - I took my son to get a haircut, and my daughter had to sit quietly while he got his hair cut - or so I thought. After 2 minutes, the lady cutting my sons hair said “Oh sweetie, I bet you’re bored just sitting there. Here, let me put a movie in the TV for you.” WHAT?!? Since WHEN do the kids need to watch TV for 10 minutes at the salon while their brother gets his hair cut? And then after the haircut, Jason got a toy - for getting his hair cut! He sat there for 10 minutes while she buzzed his head and somehow “deserved” a toy as the hair cutter lady said. Then Keira got upset because she couldn’t have a toy . . . I told her that we’d talked about it before we even got there and that only the kids who get their hair cut get a toy. She of course insisted that she immediately needed a hair cut then went in to the whole “but I sat so nicely the WHOLE time that Jason got his hair cut - so I think I deserve a toy, too…” bit. I went on to explain that sitting nicely is expected whether or not you’ve got a reward coming. The reward for behaving is that you’re not grounded when you get home!

Anyway, I was just thinking about the days when kids were allowed to be kids, but were also expected to behave no matter what. And if you didn’t behave - the long arm of the law (i.e. Dad) made a visit. The only time you expected anything was on the rare occasion you got to go to the bank with mom and you ended up with a Dum Dum - and oh boy, what a treat that was!

Do you remember when you were growing up and you were expected to:

• sit at dinner in a restaurant without crayons and a menu that you could color on (mom might have pulled a pen - a red felt one if you were super lucky - and deposit slip out of her purse for you to draw on)?
• entertain yourself on a 30 minute car ride WITHOUT a TV/iPod/GameBoy, all the while having to listen to DAD’s music of choice?
• play outside for an entire Saturday with your friends without any parent moderating or telling you to be careful?
• sit for 30 minutes on Saturday morning waiting to get your hair cut, then sitting for another 15 minutes during the hair cut, without the prospect of a cheesy toy at the end of the torture?

I’m only hoping that our kids enjoy the time the spend with us as well as their time without us. I love watching my kids outside with the neighbor kids, riding bike, playing baseball, pretending they’re dinosaurs - all sans parental involvement. They’ve all got to have time to learn and experience on their own while we guide them through life and it’s tough choices, right? I mean, if we never let our kids learn the tough lessons, how will they be able to make good choices as adults?

Reason 8,005 why we love living in Colorado! 

The Boedies in Estes Park, Colorado

A friend and previous coworker had the tough task of sending her son off to Iraq yesterday. This was a shock in many ways, first it meant that the Sean I met when he was 13 was obviously all grown up! Second, in December another friend and coworker lost her 19 year old son in Iraq - that was so difficult - I don’t want that to happen again.

The photo below is of Judy (mom), Sean, Jess (I believe she is Sean’s girlfriend), and Brick (dad). Brick made a career out of the military and fought in the first Gulf War. Judy mentioned how much tougher it was this time around than it was when Brick went off to war, saying it must be because your first instinct is to always protect your children no matter what. I can’t imagine how tough it must be to send your child off to war. I have a tough time sending my kid to the neighbor’s for a sleepover! 

Please pray for Sean and a safe return from Iraq.

I’ve always loved the smell of lilacs. My coworker, Jerri, has great lilac bushes by her house and I’m always commenting on how beautiful the flowers look and smell in her vases when she brings them to work.

Today I found a huge vase of beautiful purple lilacs on my desk. They smell oh so good and instantly put a smile on my face. I smile every time I look at them

Thanks to my friend, Jerri, for brightening my Monday!

I see a common theme in our weekends! I’m an outside freak . . . if it’s nice out, we’re outside doing something - usually playing. And during spring, my family gets a little gung ho on the whole summer thing and just can’t wait to get going.

This past weekend, I took Friday off to celebrate my hubby’s birthday - we went golfing, ran a few errands, picked the kids up from school and headed right to the ball park for tailgating with some good friends. We watched a great baseball game (the Colorado Springs Sky Sox - AAA affiliate of the Colorado Rockies) and were treated to a great fireworks show after the game. Unfortunately, it may be our last Friday Night Fireworks at the Sky Sox game. On Saturday, a Sky Sox employee was injured while preparing the pre-game fireworks. We’re praying for him and his family.

On Saturday we packed a picnic lunch, went to Jason’s soccer game, and headed up in to the mountains for a short hike at Mueller State Park. We chose the Grousse Mountain hike - there are AMAZING views at the end of the hike, which is also the highest point in the park (9,300-something feet). You can easily see 100 miles. A stop at Dairy Queen on the way home to get birthday treats for Dan since Saturday was his actual birthday. Home to clean up and out for birthday dinner. FUN!

Sunday was another great day! I got a beautiful new ring for Mother’s Day. Then our babysitter arrived and we headed up to Denver with some friends for a special Mother’s Day concert by Jim Brickman. He’s one of our favorites! Dan wrote an essay to a radio station and we won the tickets! We had a great time. Unfortunately we got stuck in traffic on the way up there so we didn’t get to enjoy the Denver Art Museum, but the concert and reception were great. Back home to the kiddies for a relaxing evening.

Now of course we’re back to Monday and another work week. And we have all week to get ready for another fun weekend ahead!

How did you spend your Mother’s Day weekend?

Happy Friday everyone!

It’s beautiful outside, the kids are at school, and I took the day off to celebrate the Hubby’s 36th B-day - so we’re off to the course!

Hoping you all have a great weekend and a wonderful Mother’s Day.

Today at 4:30, we have to put our first “child” Maggie down We are so sad I can’t even describe it.

For the past 9 years Maggie has been our hiking companion (practically dragged me and Dan up Barr Trail to the summit of Pikes Peak), our exercise buddy, our watch dog when Dan was gone travelling, and playmate for Jason and Keira.

Here’s Maggie hiking Barr Trail with me and Dan.

In March, Maggie tore her achilles tendon on her right leg. We took her to the vet and to the surgeon to see what our options were. The surgeon told us she had a good tear and with that surgery, there was an 80% success rate. She’d have to be in a hard cast for 2 months and not allowed off a leash - no running, no jumping, no anything - anyone who knows Maggie knows that’s not possible. She forgets how old she is and takes off running like she’s 2! If she did happen to take off running or even get up really fast, she would most likely break the cast, tear the sutures, and that would be it. After the 2 months, she’d be in a soft cast for another month. So for the next 3 months, an entire summer, she’d be immobile. No walks, no playing, no running. And after the recovery, still no playing ball or jumping. That is not the life for Maggie. She’s previously had elbow surgery and knee surgery and as a result has bad arthritis. She is allergic to remadyl (doggie pain meds) and can’t take them. So pretty much she’s always in some kind of pain, and after this surgery will be in even more constant pain.

Last night we told Jason and Keira and it was awful. Jason drew about 40 pictures of Maggie, all the way down to a piece of her fur! He spent the entire evening checking out every part of her and hugging her - making sure he wouldn’t forget anything. Keira just kept saying she wanted to go to bed - it was only 6:00 - and that she didn’t want Maggie to die. We all cried and Dan and I had to answer questions that we didn’t want to about what happens to dogs that are put to sleep. We told them that ultimately, she would get to be up in Heaven with “Old Grandpa” (Great Grandpa Hodapp) and play ball with Grandpa and his dog Spot without being in pain and be really happy again.

So today is our last day with Maggie - and it sucks.

Here’s Maggie taking a break on our hike up Mt. Cutler Trail last August.

Any of you mothers out there know what I’m talking about . . . that season at the end of winter where your kids are walking around in pants that look like they’re ready for a flood? Put a life jacket on ‘em and they’ll be ready! This year, short pants season seemed to start in early March. Their pants were getting a little bit too short . . . but I thought hey, they can make it another 6 weeks in those, then it’ll be warmer and they’ll be in shorts most of the time. Then came last weekend - I don’t know if it’s been all the rain, all the outdoor exercise, or all the good healthy food we’ve been eating (ha!) - but they each woke up on Sunday about 6 inches taller than when they went to bed on Saturday- or so it seemed anyway. Because when we got 9 inches of snow Sunday night and Jason had to wear pants to school instead of shorts and Keira had to put away the capris for pants on Monday, they both looked ridiculous. We rummaged around and found the “best” pair for each of them and headed out the door. When we got to school, I realized that every kid must have had that same growth spurt over the weekend and that 90% of the mothers were also holding out, hoping they could make it just a few more weeks without having to buy pants before summer. The other 10% of the mothers were lucky enough to have kids with older siblings so they could pass their pants down - those kids got to walk around pulling their pants up all day because they were a bit too big, but by golly they were not wearing pants that were too short!

I considered sewing some fun lacy type thing on the bottom of Keira’s pants, just to give her enough to make it through the next few weeks. But what to do about Jason? I’m pretty sure he won’t agree to going to school with lace on the bottom of his pants!

Here’s to hoping that my kids stop growing for just one week and it stops snowing for just one summer!