Feb 27th, 2008
Modest Prom
Prom season is nearly upon us . . . so bring out the dresses! I was very happy today when I saw a special report on the local news. A group of high school seniors, both girls and boys, from a number of different high schools in town have gotten together and created a fashion show for prom. Their goal? To showcase modest prom dresses . . . a return to the more traditional dress that is big and beautiful and flows and actually covers a girl’s body. The dresses they modeled for the news were really pretty - and not like something from 1920 
Both the guys and the girls said they were “disturbed” by the trend toward skimpy “sexy” dresses that show way too much of a girl’s body. I TOTALLY agree. It was so refreshing to see the teens themselves taking on this challenge to move away from the clothing that I think no teenage girl should be wearing.
My daughter is only 5, so definitely not working on the prom dress thing However, I was reminded of a conversation I had with another parent at a birthday party. The conversation was with the dad of a girl who came to a gymnastics birthday party wearing a short skirt (without shorts under it) and a cropped spaghetti string “shirt” - if you can call it that. The dad was saying how he “couldn’t believe what the girls these days are wearing. It’s like they’re having a contest to see who can wear the skimpiest clothes!” I was like, um dude, your daughter is 5 years old! Who the hell is BUYING her these clothes? Another conversation overheard in the ladies dressing room at Target.
Mom: So, do you like the yellow one?
8 year old girl: Oh yes yes yes! I LOVE it! I’ve always wanted a swimming suit that looked like a bra and underwear!
Um, WHAT?! This kid is 8! While I don’t see anything wrong with tasteful two-piece bathing suits, I guess it’s just the perception this kid had that bothered me.
Am I the only parent who thinks it’s possible for girls to have a positive body image and to dress cute and nice while exercising some modesty?
Anywho, I don’t know if that was a little rant for the day . . . or if it was an I’m happy to see that not all kids feel the need to show so much of their bodies at such a young age . . . or if maybe it was both.
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I am totally with you on this. My friend’s daughter went to a formal homecoming last Fall and they had a really hard time finding a dress for her to wear. They settled on this one from Nordstrom but paid over $300 for it (story for another time). If that were the case, my daughter wouldn’t go. Of course I say that now that they are only 5 & 6.
I would really like to see the younger generation have more respect for themselves in terms of the clothing they wear. Not only in terms of “sexy”, but also in terms of what is appropriate for them to wear based on their size, build, age, etc. Fad clothing has been around for 100 years and it will continue to be around for several hundred more years. However, up until the past 10 years, it seemed to me that individuals were able to use discretion and determine what fad clothing was appropriate or inappropriate for them, what looked good on them and what didn’t. Not so anymore. I can’t tell you how many overweight gals I have seen walking around with their belly rolls hanging out from under their tops…it is disgusting!!! Not to mention the low slung jeans that should be reserved for the toothpick gals only. I am convinced that 75% of those in the 15 - 25 category do not have a full length mirror in their house because if they did…and they used it…they wouldn’t leave the house dressed the way they do. I am proud to know that my grandchildren will be dressed in clothing that is appropriate for their age, their build, and in tune with moral and ethical convictions. Thanks Jodie!!!
Love…Mom
I am SO with you!
I even want my girls to start wearing one-piece bathing suits (or at least tankinini’s). While the two-pieces are so cute on little girls, I want them to get used to one-pieces so that when they’re older, they’re not thinking that they HAVE to keep wearing two-pieces and get skimpier and skimpier and skimpier.
I totally agree that it’s disturbing how *acceptable* the skimpy clothing has become. Don’t these girls realize the messages they are sending, even to dirty old men? It’s sad when our pastor has to periodically address the issue from the pulpit of what women and girls wear to church and why they need to put a little more thought into their choices. There are definitely ways to be cute, trendy, *and* modest, and even your friends will respect you more if you stick to your guns.
Hubby has already put in place the rules that our girls will have to follow when they’re older. Modest clothing and swimsuits, no boys in their bedrooms, no going into a boy’s bedroom, introduce us to your friends, etc. After all, when do you draw the line?
My almost five year old wears clothes that are appropriate for her age…but I do buy her a two piece bathing suit only because it makes bathroom trips easier.
I was shocked when my first daughter got too big for me to buy her clothes in the infant/toddler section! The first time I went to the little girl’s section I saw mini skirts (with no shorts under) and halter tops with sequins. I almost cried, wondering how I was going to dress my 5 year old, so that she didn’t look like a hooker!
We have a rule of modest clothing and my children are very used to the layered look. They know which shirts they need to wear a tank top underneath, because I feel that they are too low cut (or too short). Is lowcut really an issue now? No, of course not, they are 6 and 4, but when they are older I don’t want THAT to be the time that we approach the “your chest is showing” conversation. They also know that we only allow one peice swimming suits and that is ALL that will ever be allowed. I don’t care how old they are. (I’ll chase down my 35 year old daughter…don’t tempt me!) LOL
I agree with Shirley. That was very well stated. I am very appreciative that I have a daughter-in-law that is so sensible.
Sue
Awesome post And I definitely agree with it and your commenter’s. Our society has hit a terrible low point. The kids judgment is terrible, some parents are allowing way to much, the media is exploiting our children and the stores are peddling crap.
I went to buy my 13 year old a skirt for a function last year and I could find NOTHING THAT CAME DOWN BELOW THE DARN KNEE! We went to 5 different stores. I ended up buying her a small size adult petite skirt to wear. It is ridiculous and very sad…
Yeah for you! I am with you. I like buying Ashlyn fun and cute clothes–that are appropriate for her age. She should not look like an adult. Heck- half the time I can’t believe what adults wear. Anyway, I agree with you!
I totally agree with the fact that it is very difficult to find modest prom dresses. My sister just go married last month and we had the hardest time finding modest bridesmaid dresses!! Everything is sleeveless and tight! By the way, I am selling my dress (a modest ball gown) on Ebay if anyone is interested. It was a beautiful dress. It is Ebay ID #300204590891 Here is the direct link to the listing: http://cgi.ebay.com/Davids-Bridal-Persimmon-Dress-Bridesmaid-Prom-Modest_W0QQitemZ300204590891QQihZ020QQcategoryZ3262QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem
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