Common Mom

We had a wonderful time on our trip to MN last week/weekend. Of course, when you spend 14 hours in a car, twice, you hear some fun things from the back seat. And there is never a dull moment when you’re around Grandparents

This Little Voice is compliments of my Princess. Noisy Grandma was getting ready in the bathroom. Princess was standing on the toilet, leaning on the counter with her elbows, just watching.

Princess: Grandma, what’s that stuff you’re putting on your face?
Grandma: It’s lotion to help me not get wrinkles.

30 second pause - deep concentration by Princess

Princess: Grandma, did you forget to put that on one day?

Yes, for real! You, too, are now only 5 minutes from chocolate cake

Be sure to check out Pam at Random Thoughts to see what other yummy goodness is out there for recipes this month!

Ingredients:

• 1 Coffee Mug
• 4 T flour (regular flour, not self-rising)
• 4 T sugar
• 2 T baking cocoa
• 1 egg
• 3 T milk
• 3 T oil
• 3 T chocolate chips (optional)
• Small splash vanilla

Method:

• Add dry ingredients to mug and mix well.
• Add the egg and mix thoroughly.
• Pour in the milk and oil and mix well.
• Add the chocolate chips and vanilla and mix again.
• Put mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts.
• The cake will rise over the top of the mug. Don’t be alarmed!
• Allow to cool a little.
• Eat! This can serve two if you want to tip it onto a plate and share

This was forwarded in an e-mail and made me chuckle

Whenever your children are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God’s omnipotence did not extend to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.

And the first thing he said was: DON’T!

‘Don’t what ?’ Adam replied.

‘Don’t eat the forbidden fruit.’ God said.

‘Forbidden fruit? We have forbidden fruit? Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit!’
‘No Way!’
‘Yes way!’

‘Do NOT eat the fruit!’ said God.

‘Why?’
‘Because I am your Father and I said so!’ God replied, wondering why He hadn’t stopped creation after making the elephants.

A few minutes later, God saw His children having an apple break and He was ticked!

‘Didn’t I tell you not to eat the fruit?’  God asked.

‘Uh huh,’  Adam replied.

‘Then why did you?’  said the Father.

‘I don’t know,’ said Eve.

‘She started it!’ Adam said.

‘Did not!’
‘Did too!’
‘DID NOT!’

Having had it with the two of them, God’s punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven’t taken it, don’t be hard on yourself.

If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for you?

Even though Dude did not find the perfect Halloween costume on our whirlwind tour of all stores costume on Sunday, he did find one that he found pleasantly amusing. It was this one from Old Navy.

Princess and Mom are browsing the kitty cat costume rack to see if they have the right size.

Dude: Hey Mom! Look at this cute monkey costume!

Me: That one is cute! Too bad you’re not a baby anymore or you could be that.

Dude: That would have been cool. Ya know what I like best about it?

Me: No. What?

Dude: The banana.

Me: (not really paying attention) The what?

Dude: The ba-NA-na. If I had this costume, I could have a banana in my pocket.

Me: (trying to hide my immature giggles). Dude, I wouldn’t go around telling everyone that you have a banana in your pocket.

Dude: Why not? What’s so bad about having a banana in your pocket?

Me: Just trust me.

When you’re 5, it’s apparently very difficult to choose what, exactly, you want to be for Halloween. I mean, it’s totally possible that you are 100% sure you want to be a princess, like Sleeping Beauty or Snow White, and then you end up with something totally different in the end. I present you with The Great Debate costume shopping saga of ‘08

Yes we went costume shopping in September . . . I have a to do list a gazillion miles long and I desperately needed to cross something off of it. Don’t judge. Instead, come help me consume a bottle of wine this evening

We start off at Wal-mart, specifically to get Princess the Snow White costume she wants for Halloween. We find one similar to this one. But of course it’s Halloween and now it’s a costume so it’s more than $25, which is more than I like to spend for Halloween, but I figured she’d use it for dress up after Halloween was over. So we got it.

Then we were off to the mall to get Dude and Princess each a pair of shoes and to continue our search for his costume (which he never did find!). We stopped in The Children’s Place because I LOVE LOVE LOVE that store! I usually just get to look, because it’s too spendy for my taste. But lo and behold, there was “the most beautiful and perfect witch costume ohmygod it’s in my size can I please have it please please please” right in front. It was less expensive than Snow White, so I bought it for her. She of course realized we had to take Snow White back to the store. We didn’t get more than 2 steps away from the check out counter when she said “Oh I’m so sorry mommy, but actually I REALLY want to be Snow White.” We talked about it, and I told her I’d have to return the witch. She was good with it. So I turned around and we returned the witch. Back to Snow White.

We continued on our search for a pair of shoes for Dude that he and I both agreed on (style and acceptable price are difficult to match when you’re 8!). On the way, we stopped at the Spirit Halloween store. Dude did not find the exact costume he was looking for (I’m really not sure it even exists!), but ohmygod there’s a beautiful and ohsoperfect for me velvetty red regal princess costume that even has a crown ohmygod I can’t stand it can I try it on pleasepleaseplase! I had her try it on, and it WAS adorable . . . and WARM for our chilly Halloweens that we have here. For reasons unbeknownst to me, I bought it for her. Really - I paid $42 for a friggin’ Halloween costume! I blame it on Hubby being gone for a week and severe lack of sleep for me

Off to Dick’s Sporting Goods to look for shoes for Dude! He DID finally find a pair, but while he was looking, Princess found a pair that she really liked. I found myself saying “Sweetie, they’re really cute, but you’re 5. I am not spending $45 on a pair of shoes for a 5 year old.” Then I thougth what the hell am I saying?! I won’t pay $45 for a pair of shoes she’ll wear for a good 6 months, but I DID just spend $42 on a friggin’ Halloween costume she’ll wear for MAYBE 6 hours total? Sheesh. (Princess did NOT get the shoes.)

Out of the mall with Dude’s shoes, Princess’ $13 shoes, and a ridiculously expensive costume for Princess. We headed to King Soopers to pick up some groceries on the way home. On the way to the checkout, we walked down the Halloween aisle (I’m a glutton for punishment). And ohmygod it’s amazing and ooooohhh so cute and I just HAVE to be this for Halloween can I get it please please please!!!

After all that, THIS is what she’s ending up being for Halloween . . . a pink Unicorn. A pink unicorn that we got at the grocery store for $15.

Ahhhhh - life with a little girl - one who can’t make up her mind to save her own life! Now I just need Hubby to return Snow White and Red Regal Princess tomorrow before she changes her mind yet again!

So last night, or early this a.m. technically, the phone rings. Of course I BOLT out of bed because the phone never rings at 2:00 a.m. It’s a reverse 911 call . . . apparently some really nice guy from New Mexico kidnapped a woman and drove the 5 hours to my city . . . they found his car about 2 miles from my house. They consider him armed and dangerous, even though they haven’t found the guy yet.

So yay for the call . . . nice gesture. Not yay for the 2:00 a.m. part of it . . . the time on the recording? 11:04 p.m. Really, it took 3 hours for the computer to call my house? I would guess the phone system could call more than one number at a time. And even if it couldn’t, my last name starts with B, so I’m near the beginning. I feel for the Zeldingers of the world; they’ll probably get a call around 3:00 TONIGHT!

Of course we got an email from school saying they’re on a category 1 controlled lockdown . . . meaning none of the kids can go outside unless accompanied by their parent or to get on/off a bus today. Needless to say, Dude stayed in the car at the bus stop until the bus came (it was raining anyway) and I’ll be bolting out of work early today to get home before the bus so he doesn’t have to walk home with some freak on the loose!

I was looking through some of my older scrapbooks to find some photos of me and my Dad. I came across this photo in my softball album . . . my Dad’s not in it, but it brought back some awesome memories.

As I mentioned in my post on Wednesday, I played on a travelling softball team. 5 of us on that team worked at the same McDonald’s . . . and our manager was nice enough to give all of us every weekend off all summer so we could play in tournaments. The owner of the store was a VERY nice man and pledged $100 to each of us ($500 total) toward our fundraising if we washed 250 cars in one Saturday afternoon in the store parking lot - we did and he did.

I hope Dude likes baseball as much as I loved softball! The memories I have from playing softball are some of my best memories ever!

Thank you to my Dad for buying me a catcher’s mitt he probably couldn’t afford just because he knew I really wanted it. Oh, and thank you for setting me up in front of the bathroom at the campground, putting a glove on my hand, and pitching to me when I was 9 - it certainly helped me not be afraid of the ball

Thank you to my Mom for travelling all over and spending every weekend of my teenage summers sitting at softball fields watching me play a game I love rather than sitting at the lake enjoying the water you love.

Thank you to my teammates and friends for helping me make such wonderful memories that I will cherish always.

Thank you to my coaches for volunteering their time and making the game so much fun that I wanted to play it every day all day and never got tired of it.

Thank you to Mr. Bamberry for being flexible enough to allow us to work at his store and still play softball every weekend all summer. (And to all 4 of my readers, if you ever find yourself in the tiny metropolis that is  Mankato, MN, eat at McDonald’s!)

Did you feel that incredibly cold draft yesterday? I did . . . it was hell freezing over!!! I’m sure it happened, because I went to the DMV to get a duplicate title for our car and it only took me 10 minutes! My backside hadn’t even hit the chair in the waiting area before I was called to the counter where I proceded to have a PLEASANT conversation with the lady who helped me. I left in stunned silence, very pleasantly surprised.

And, it’s picture day today . . . and Dude did NOT, I repeat DID NOT choose to wear anything camoflauge to school for the occasion. I just about fell off my chair at breakfast when he walked out WITHOUT camo on his body. Granted, he did choose a Tony Hawk shirt with a skateboarding skeleton on it, but hey - we’re making baby steps here.

Tomorrow is the big day . . . the last day to hand in magazine orders for my son’s school fundraiser.

I have pretty strong feelings about fundraisers. I played on a travelling softball team for many years, and since it was a private type of a thing, we had to raise money for our trips to regional and national tournaments. I spent countless summer hours washing people’s cars and selling rootbeer floats in the grocery store parking lot. I was 15-18 years old during this time. I think it’s great for kids to learn that they need to earn money to do things they want to do that are out of the norm. As an adult, I’ve spent many a minute waiting for teenagers to wash my car in the Wal-mart parking lot, or buying candy bars to send the neighbor kid’s baseball team to the national tournament.

I do not, however, think that my 8 year old should be required to sell magazines to raise funds for his public school. I understand that schools need more funding than the government gives them. And I understand that not every family is fortunate enough to be able to afford all the stuff kids need for school. But I will not send my 8 year old door-to-door, and I will not take the nifty little order form to work. I’m sorry, but I don’t want to teach my 8 year old to go around asking other people for money. And, my coworkers have kids of their own; I’m not going to ask them to buy stuff from my kid for his school. I occasionally buy stuff when coworkers set out order forms, but it’s because we eat popcorn, not because I want a 50,000 calorie butter braid. So when Dude brought home the magazine order forms and told me all about the assembly they had at school (yes, they spent 2 hours telling the kids how to sell magazines!) and about all the prizes that he could win, I was not so happy about it. He’s 8! I did help him fill out the address cards to send to family members because just for filling them out and handing them in he got some goofy trick wallet, and I knew the G’ma’s and G’pa’s wouldn’t care. But I refused to ask them to buy anything so Dude could win a seat at the Cancer Dot ice cream of the future party DURING SCHOOL HOURS, or so he could win some other cheap prize. Turns out, the grandparents and one close family friend did order magazines, so he’s happy - and he’s in the drawing to win an iPod Touch. But I just have a hard time with this whole fundraisers for public school stuff. Oh, and he also brought home another fundraiser - the Entertainment Book - which is solely to help out the music department so they can buy a computer and some other thing. For the record, I always buy an Entertainment Book - but EVERY kid on the planet sells them, and I’m not going to ask anyone to buy from my kid. What really got me was that the music director told the 3rd graders that they had to either sell their book or buy it themselves. What?! And this after I sent in checks totalling about $25 for various things at school the week before . . . $4 for this, $5 for that, etc.

So anyway - I don’t think it’s appropriate to send my 8 year old out to sell magazines and Entertainment Books. Maybe when he’s older and understands what he’s doing and what the money goes for. And don’t even get me started on the prizes. Why do kids have to be bribed to do everything, including earning money for their teams or school or whatever? Whatever happened to the pride of knowing that you helped out and worked hard for something you wanted? Yes, I will continue to pay $5 to get my car half-washed by the kids in the Wal-Mart parking lot. No, I will not allow my 8 year old, or my 10 year old, heck probably not even my 12 year old, to go around asking other people for money.

How about you? What are your thoughts on public school fundraisers? 

Dude was bouncing off the walls when I got home yesterday . . . he couldn’t WAIT to talk to me! He had $6 in his hand and just HAD to talk to me and then go immediately to Josh’s house to play. What was so important?

A salamander.

That Josh is selling, for $7.

“But Mom, the salamander is only $7 . . . and the cage is FREE!”

“Why does josh want to sell his salamander?”

“Because he saw another lizard that he wants instead, but he can only have one at a time, so he offered to let me buy the one he has now.”

Me and my big mouth! I was telling Dude and Princess how I had a gerbil when I was in 2nd grade . . . and how my brother took it out of the cage and put it in my friend’s bag when she was sleeping over . . . and how Sammy White (my gerbil) got to be in my classroom at school as the class pet and would get out of his cage sometimes, so we’d have to spend an hour in the morning looking for him before class started . . . and how I had to clean his cage . . . and feed him . . . and whatever else it is you do with a gerbil.

So really, I’m not against Dude having a salamander . . . and since he wants to use his own money, go for it!

But I asked him what we’d do with the salamander when we were gone . . . like on vacation . . . or camping . . . or in MN visiting family. He just looked at the floor and went “Oh.” I did not offer that maybe one of the neighbor boys would come feed the salamander while we were gone . . . or maybe Josh would lizardsit it while we’re gone.

I guess we’ll have to talk again today . . . and maybe Google Salamanders and How to Care for Them

I mean for $7 and a free cage, how can you go wrong?

EDITED: Apparently, when you Google “salamander pet” the first thing you come to is this . . . a 7-part series on owning a salamander or newt . . . including information on housing, diet, and parasites. You gotta love the Internet!